One day you’re beloved, & the next

you’re only loved. What I’ve learned

in times of distress could fill a matchbook.

To survive this world you have to fold

your pain like tucking the corners in on a bed. 

You have to believe your circumstances

will change, somehow, when they won’t.

It’s not enough to want without wanting,

you have to find your own happiness like

a blind surveyor searching for oil in hell.

Time is cruel but on my bad days I’m crueler,

I drink all the light & carry my gloom

in take-out boxes. I’m sitting on my bed,

eating, while the world spins around me.

All my friends are taking selfies in cities

with carvings on the bathroom mirror.

All my heroes are dead, broke, or in jail 

& all the honest men I know look like shit.