Lemon Tree

The worst part— there is no genesis
in which I earn the blush white of the lemon this exquisite

guilt, grief, my circle of bitter light. What happened?

I did everything right.

I did everything right religion, ritually, and still I've fallen

so completely into the teeth of my depression, the reality
surprises me.

It hurts to live waiting
for the axe to fall,

and the axe never falls.

Jill Mceldowney is the author of OTHERLIGHT (YesYes Books). She is the editor and founder of Madhouse Press. Her previously published work can be found in journals such as Prairie Schooner, Fugue, Muzzle, and other notable publications.